Five years

Possibly depressing post alert.  :-)
There are a couple of times per year that I put my heart out for everyone to see. This is one of them. April 2nd was the due date for our first child, a boy named Christian Robert, whom we lost in the second trimester of pregnancy.
I'm watching my two little ones play right now and my heart is filled with such love and joy. Every day it seems like there's a moment where it hits me that there should be 3 of them rather than just two. I still find myself wondering what he would have looked like, how much Gabriel would have looked up to (and irritated) his big brother, how both boys would have done such a great job looking out for their little sister. It just floors me that he would have turned 5 this year. Time really does fly. With all that we have been through, I'm fully aware of how blessed we are to have the family we do.
Well, I'm going to have cut this post short. My darling son saw a little tear in my eye while I was typing. He just came over to me and said, "Mommy, do you want to hold my hand?" I said, "Absolutely!!". then he asked, "Mommy, you want to come play with me?"  Sometimes he seems like a wise old soul at the ripe old age of 3.
I'm off!